Sunday, December 18, 2011

Christmas Countdown Day 7

The whirl of Christmas, the world of Christmas,
There’s both magic and madness in the air.
Rich Perrotti, Christmas 1985

8 ... 7 ...

Santa and Elf in the Sleigh Pulled by Reindeer
In a whirling
of Christmas
magic, crayon
Santa in sleigh
transports me to Dec 1988 – designing our own greeting card, sharing a child's drawing, an image created by our daughter-artist age five.

Within days of sending our first homemade card we will officially become a family in a late-December wedding. Mom, Dad, Daughter and Son, young lives woven together, ready to celebrate this one on our own. My parents' house is no longer the place we call home for Christmas. For the first time we stay in, opt out of traveling, not-so-gently breaking my mother's heart.

Our plans for a first quiet Christmas Eve, a new tradition, are dashed when my soon-to-be-mother-in-law calls ... she is
alone tonight, could we visit, for 64 miles is not that far to go?
I begrudgingly bundle the children and we set out in the cold, drive miles north for a visit, then more miles back home.

This sounds like a Christmas giving story, though it is not.

In the days between then and our wedding, a plan is revealed. My soon-to-be-sisters confirm and agree, that multiple Christmas Eve invitations were extended, their mother turned down not just one, but three! Did SHE choose to manipulate, fake HER distress? In betrayal SHE pushed me away with both hands. My heart hardens in anger! Her scheme takes a toll.

I did not learn to love her. I mourn this today. All those years wasted! This cannot be the way.

In the pain and the hurt I discover a key: I choose Hope and the Strength to love differently.

Then Joseph woke up. He did exactly what 
God's angel commanded in the dream: 
He married Mary ... He named the baby Jesus.

24 Dec 1988 Weather low 19º with winds gusting to 28 mph

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