i am a mess.
serving at a food pantry is difficult.
serving at a food pantry while looking in my own mirror and feeling the dark shadow of poverty creep up behind me is more than difficult.
the sadness is often so heavy on my heart that i feel as though my body will simply stop breathing.
yet 'not breathing' never happens.
i breathe because only God decides when breathing stops.
so i often feel stuck here in this place and this time ... and when i whine "Why?" the words of Dan Allender haunt me:
"What is God doing?" he asks.
and my focus shifts:
God is providing.
God is providing daily bread.
God is providing physical fitness in time spent unloading trucks filled with food.
and when weight loss diminishes the options in my closet:
God is providing sparkling hand-me-up jeans from my friend Destiny.
"Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.
For I am the Lord your God, ..."
Isaiah 43:1-3 excerpt NIV
Vocation and Passion by Dan Allender inspires me