My Eulogy

Renee wanted us to remember the
5th grader, the girl deeply wounded and passionately driven.

A young woman who refused to accept the idea, "I can't. I can't because I'm a girl."

A habitual speeder, a magnet for traffic citations. A woman who had trouble relinquishing the steering wheel to God.

A woman for whom wisdom and a quiet spirit was an uphill battle.

A woman who left this world HAVING it all.

Having:
changed lives, a handful of lives,
the lives and hearts God asked her to touch.

Having:
loved and served God,
loved and cherished her husband, the man God designed to be her closest friend,
loved and mentored and comforted her children,
while hoping and praying she was teaching her children to love.

Having:
lived with authenticity,
stretched herself,
challenged us to something greater, helped us to stretch and reach.

Having:
embraced grief and joy on her earthly journey,
living her life in a way that left no doubt that God is with us.

I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may
 be complete. My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.
Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. 

—John 15:11-13 NIV

My Legacy read more

My Manifesto read more

Me? read more

My Heartbeat read more

Rw
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Cookie Bake

Leading up to the sugar-infused holiday called Christmas, the women in my family gather together to bake cookies, each woman bringing favorite doughs and ingredients.

Oreo cookies

cream cheese

almond bark

mixed together in my kitchen

join a sisterhood of sweetness multiplied

mothers

grandmothers

nieces

cousins

aunts

daughters

sisters

Mary didn't waste a minute. She got up and traveled 
to a town in Judah in the hill country, straight 
to Zachariah's house, and greeted Elizabeth. 
When Elizabeth heard Mary's greeting, 
the baby in her womb leaped. Luke 1 MSG


Rw
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Spumoni

Preferring tidy boundaries, I hesitate to mix things up. Faced with the multifarious offerings of Baskin Robbins, I choose two scoops, one flavor: maple nut. My husband lives more deliciously.

One favorite, Spumoni, is a 3-layer creation infused with pistachio pieces, chocolate chunks and bits of cherries. We first discover Spumoni at an Italian restaurant, after he is promoted from
the on-site construction team into the corporate office. His new job includes weekly travel, airports and suits-n-ties. Our Tuesday-morning routine is dropping Dad at the airport; our Thursday night his homecoming.

The taste of Spumoni takes me back to 1988, a rented 2-bedroom apartment, sharing one car, decorating sugar cookies Wednesday night, serving potato soup with grated and sliced cheese, and a crusty bread, for our dinner on Christmas Eve.

Our meal blends robust cheeses nestled inside gifted boxes with simple ingredients: whole milk, potatoes, parsley, butter, salt, bread. A poinsettia on our table, one just like it gifted to other couples existing the company holiday party, an upscale hotel.
A paper plate angel on our tree.
Sugar cookies as dessert.

Tearing off the outer wrappings, the crisp suits-n-ties corporate culture of this shiny American holiday, reveals a quiet simplicity
... a young family working and making ends meet at Christmas.

Sharing potato soup with grated and sliced cheese, and a crusty bread for dinner on Christmas Eve. We continue our tradition.

After all these years, I am learning how to live more deliciously.

"What I'm interested in seeing you do is:

sharing your food with the hungry,

inviting the homeless poor into your homes,

putting clothes on the shivering ill-clad,

being available to your own families."

Isaiah 58:7 MSG

"Then the light of my blessing

will shine on you like the rising sun."

Isaiah 58:8 NIRV

Rw
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Legacy 2

In the opening pages of "The Transforming Friendship" by Leslie D. Weatherhead, the author dedicates his book:

To

LYN

TRUE WIFE AND TRUEST FRIEND

WHO HAS TAUGHT ME SO MUCH CONCERNING

HUMAN FRIENDSHIP

AS TO DEEPEN MY FAITH IN THAT WHICH

IS DIVINE

First Edition
February 1928
The Camelot Press Limited
London and Southampton
Great Britain


Legacy by Tim Belber
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." —Ralph Waldo Emerson One definition of legacy is what someone feels, thinks for says where they hear your name. What are you doing today to build the legacy you want? TB

Legacy

Months ago, I skipped The 7 Habits ... and began with a borrowed copy of The 8th. All around me friends were writing their eulogies, and I was thinking about my obituary. Vastly different words. Eulogy. Obituary.

As I read Covey's The 8th Habit, I found myself rolling up my sleeves and doing the work. I culled through a year of scribbled appointments in my calendar and the box full of disheveled receipts in my office. I examined the trails of my own time alongside my husband's money, then made changes. People with worthy projects fell away from my "Giving To" list as I intentionally concentrated on people and passions closest to my heart.

Today, as I imagine my own funeral, the duo becomes a trio: Eulogy. Obituary. Legacy.

Obituary is math. Dates. Names. Spouse, children, siblings, in-laws, parents, workplace, hobbies. In print. Black easily-smudged soy-based-ink numbers and letters on not-so-white paper made from recycled newspapers. One photograph?

Eulogy is ceremony. Words written and shared by one or two people, probably from a podium, at the front of an empty or crowded room. Sentences spoken about me in the memorial service, phrases formally marking the passage of me, the end of one life here on earth. A neatly framed collection of photos? A bulletin board covered with snapshots?

Legacy is celebration. It is a collection of 'remember whens' easily shared, at the funeral luncheon, over a morning cup of coffee or a afternoon glass of wine, across a campfire, around a Thanksgiving table. The stories told about me by the people who shared in the living. The black-lettered words of obituary coming alive in the color and movement of shared memories.

Legacy is layered with innumerable voices
— a papier-mâché sculpture of me.

Rw


Legacy by Tim Belber
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson One definition of legacy is what someone feels, thinks and says when they hear your name. What are you doing today to build the legacy you want? TB